Believing is seeing. How to believe your way to results
Did you know your beliefs have the biggest impact on your life than any other factor? And what you believe defines your life? Tony Robbins puts it very nicely:
“Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives.”
We all carry around numerous beliefs that come from a variety of sources including our own interpretation of the world around us. Some are inherited from our parents and linked to childhood experiences. Others are created along life’s journey. Humans cannot not learn, yet sometimes we learn things that are inaccurate.
Beliefs are a choice. There’s more good news. You can eliminate beliefs that no longer serve you and replace them with beliefs that empower you. It’s not easy but totally possible. It takes time, demands patience and perseverance. One reason people partner with a coach when they embark on a change journey is to get out of their own way. Sometimes you must do the work on your own. For this reason, I’ve developed a four-part self-coaching programme to help you identify and let go of limiting beliefs. See how to access it at the end of this blog.
Aside from working with your beliefs, you can also decide to believe something is on its way.
How to believe something you cannot see
How many times have you heard other people say, ‘I’ll believe that when I see it?’ How many times have you said it yourself?
If you didn’t nail that job / reach that goal / succeed this time, there’s always another opportunity. Today is never the last chance unless you give up. There’s always a way and another door to open. Feel good about moving forward. However, slow. See yourself as a creator and set new goals from the future rather than past failures.
Own your goal. Be in the right ENERGY. See your creation as good as done. Be in this energy. Feel what you want to feel as if you have created it / achieved your goal / nailed that job.
My goodness it’s hard. BUT WORTH IT!
You must believe (internally) before you can see it with your own eyes (physical manifestation). Ignore what others say and even think. Choose who you share your deepest desires with. Not every belief, dream or wish needs to be shared with the outside world.
If you are looking for love, imagine you have found your dream partner. How does it feel? How do you speak to yourself? What are you spending your time doing? Really tap into this feeling. Imagine they are by your side and how this feels.
Choose an empowering story to tell
You are not your thoughts (which always come and go). They are not facts. Just stories your brain makes up to keep you safe. Your brain is hardwired to protect you from pain. Change is uncomfortable and sometimes painful. Therefore, it looks for evidence to prove that something will not happen. By focusing on past failures and rejections and projecting them into the future, you are setting the scene for more failure.
STOP!
To break the cycle of looking for evidence based on past failures, you need to take action to create new evidence. And change the stories you are telling about your past and failures. Now is the time to get clear on the stories you want to tell yourself about your future.
Choose thoughts that support and serve you
Be aware of your thinking patterns. Self-sabotaging thoughts move you away from your deepest desires, not closer to them.
Learn to love the process of improvement and see moving forward as a step-by-step journey. Recognise that falling off track, failing and starting again are part of any process. Give yourself small rewards along the way. These can be internal words of encouragement or external mini rewards (e.g., buying your favourite magazine) that don’t have to set you back financially.
Choose to say, “every day I am getting better at xxx.” As opposed to, “I screwed that one up again.” Remember, you always have a choice in how you think about yourself.
Reconnect with your goal
Again, and again and again. Never lose sight of your why.
· Why do you want that job?
· Why do you want a life partner?
· Why do you want to change career?
· What’s the emotional goal behind your goal?
Dig into past successes and look for evidence to support you in your pursuit of your current goal. They are there if you look hard enough.
People need people
The solo path is a lonely path. Borrow the belief in you from someone else, until you have it in yourself. This might be an accountability buddy, a coach or a best friend.
‘If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.’
African proverb
Use encouraging stories from others to maintain faith
I’m a big fan of sharing inspirational quotes and real-life success stories from others. Just as you become who you hang out with, your beliefs and inner stories are affected by what you read and listen to. Here’s a little encouragement from James Clear:
"It took me...
200+ articles before I got a book deal.
250+ articles before I got major media coverage.
100+ interviews before my book hit the bestseller list.
You need a lot of shots on a goal. Not everything will work, but some of it will.
Keep shooting."
Aim for mastery. Ultimately, practice is the path of mastery. Mastery is staying on the path. Do you what you have to do to stay on the path.
Finally, here’s one last reason to keep believing - it makes you feel better. The feeling of positive anticipation that what you want is on its way, is a great feeling and can put a smile on your face and a spring in your step on the dreariest of days. It also helps to build an inner trust that all your hard work will pay off. Eventually.
Keep believing!
FREE self-coaching programme available now
Access the four-part self-coaching programme to let go of limiting beliefs by signing up for my monthly newsletter at www.karinweiser.com. I write about career transition, give tips on maintaining a positive mindset and share new ideas, all sprinkled with positivity and encouragement.
Photo by Nine Koepfer on Unsplash